Monday, August 22, 2011

Time for Kelly to get his Eastwood On




Chip Kelly has been holding his tongue, keeping the peace all summer long now. I think, in the style of a Clint Eastwood spaghetti western,  it's high time for him to set his drink down with the force of a gavel and slowly stand up -- the "ching ching" of his spurs echoing in the otherwise silent saloon. Push the card table a few inches away from him to give him some space. Then look the bastards in the eyes, and tell them how it's going to be.

Starting with . . . .

"Hey Willie, you can pay back that 25 grand you owe us, or I can just nail your big flappy lips to the floor.
Come to think of it, somebody get me a hammer and some nails."

Lache Seastrunk has left Oregon. That's all folks. Hope you enjoyed the show. Good night and drive safely.

The Seastrunk era ended before it started, and yet packed enough drama and events for a 5th year senior. What did Oregon get for him? A giant FUBAR (Fuskied Up Beyond All Recognition). That check for $25,000 to Slick Willie Lyles raised the eyebrows of NCAA investigators . . . . . No wait, let's back up.

Oregon's successful recruitment of Seastrunk raised the ire of SEC and other Texas schools -- "Not in OUR backyard," they said. So using the ol' handkerchief over the the phone trick, they called the NCAA and slipped them the juicy "Deep Throat" tip that Oregon was paying way too much for mere films and stats.

Here's the real truth. Those giant Southern football factories of LSU, Alabama, Oklahoma, Auburn and at least five others in the great state of Texas . . . They're not mad that Oregon allegedly paid 25 grand to leverage a Texas boy to Eugene. They're FURIOUS that had they thought they could've gotten away with it, they would've gladly paid 50-, 75-, or even 100,000 dollars to get him! 

Oregon apparently beat them at their own "greased palm" game for a bargain! So the NCAA makes like "Smokey and the Bandit", and their flashing lights appear in Oregon's rear view mirror. And now they're all, "You in a heap-a-trouble, boy." More about them later.  

But is that what Oregon really did? How much trouble is Oregon really in?  I'm sure you've read all you can stomach about the whole Willie Lyles, Lache Seastrunk, $25,000 payment "scandal". If you haven't, Google those two names and have a ball. We'll wait right here til you're all caught up . . . . . . . . .

What some of you may not be aware of is that one blogger, Scott Reed of "The Other Side of Duck" had better success at contacting the people close to Seastrunk. He was able to piece together the story of Seastrunk's journey to Oregon that was far less influenced by Willie Lyles than what Lyles wants the world to believe.

Reed is a little long-winded, but he's a thoughtful writer, and he appears to have done his homework. He mainly lays it out in three posts: "Who was Lache's Mentor?"  "Who was Lache's Mentor, Part II", and "Seastrunk Family Clears the Air."

After reading those stories, I came away with the conclusion that any time and resources the NCAA puts into investigating this "scandal" will be time and resources wasted.

Willie Lyles likes to hear himself talk.  A lot.  He's so smooth, sharing his sad story to Yahoo, the NCAA, and anyone else about how he's the victim. Oh ya, Lyles, you're just trying to make a living and help the kids, and the world hates you for it.  Is he noticing yet that it's harder to get anyone to return his calls?  

And after setting themselves up as Lyles personal megaphone, are the folks at Yahoo  so busy patting themselves on the back for suddenly getting thrust in the spotlight as big time sports investigators that they're too stupid to see the big "SUCKER" signs on their foreheads?

As for Lache Seastrunk, he's not the bad guy here. He's done nothing wrong. Scratch that. He let himself down in one area. He failed to stay 1, 2, or 3 on Oregon's depth chart. Slipping to as low as #5 of late, he apparently became discouraged. No one should say a single bad thing about this young kid. I wish him nothing but the best.

Now, back to the NCAA. . . . .

"HEY NCAA, GO DUCK YOURSELVES!"

It bothers me to see Oregon mentioned in the same paragraph or breath with the other "problem schools" like Ohio State, USC, Connecticut, South Carolina, Tennessee, and last but not least, Miami.  The violations of all of these other schools involve extreme cases of giving players extra benefits -- money, cars, apartments, academic cheating.

Lache Seastrunk didn't receive a cent. LaMichael James hasn't received a cent. Furthermore, before those two, there were Terrell Pryor and Reggie Bush.

Bush was heavily recruited by Oregon. His final choices came between the Ducks and USC.  For Pryor, it came down to Ohio State, Penn State and Oregon. Looking back, it is clear that the schools they chose, USC and Ohio State respectively, were able to offer them things that Oregon couldn't or wouldn't.

Meanwhile as these scandals grow more numerous, the NCAA is shown to be run by a short-sighted, knee jerk reactionary in President Mark Emmert.

"More sanctions," "Harsher penalties," "The DEATH Penalty," is all Emmert screams. He can't see the forest for the trees. He can't see the difference between an Oregon and an Ohio State. And worst of all, he can't see that the college sports world is laughing at the pitiful NCAA.

The NCAA system is broken, and all Emmert knows to do is come down with harsh program killing penalties without fixing the fundamental flaws of the system.

How ridiculous is it when the NCAA takes months and years to complete an investigation and hand down severe punishments to schools long after the guilty players and coaches are long gone?

How stupid is it when NCAA investigators waste time and resources on ticky-tac stuff like a coach buying a player a Coke while Miami and Ohio State flaunt the system in full view?

Should the NCAA choose to come down hard on Oregon for this silly Willie Lyles FUBAR after a snail's paced investigation, it'll say more about the NCAA than Oregon. In fact I hope it exposes them as the bunch of buffoons they are.

It is ironic that a similar episode occurred when, over 30 years ago, an undergraduate stood up for his rights and shook his fist at the system. On the University of Oregon campus, a pre-law student ("I thought you were pre-med."  "What's the difference?") spoke eloquently of how the indictment of his organization was an indictment of the whole system and even the country.
Stick this in your double-secret probation, NCAA!!!

In case you miss the connections: Dean Wormer is NCAA President Mark Emmert. Otter is Oregon. Greg represents the "Good Ol' Boy" Football Schools of the South. And the Sorority sister in the pink cashmere sweater struggling to get down every word? That's Ken Goe.

One more thing. Recently, the media got ahold of police video that suggested Darron Thomas and marijuana were in the same car with speed racer Cliff Harris. The next morning, BREAKING NEWS:

COLLEGE STUDENT SMOKES POT *   *Allegedly

Really, sports writers?
Really?

Oh what kind of world do we live in where priviledged collegians show no regard for organized society, openly smoking the brain numbing weed in front of responsible elders who work for an honest living. Elders like you journalists who stand for ethics and morality (See Canzano's sermon on Leadership). But what does that get you? Nothing. For these disrespectful young degenerates have already burned the bud that you dutifully stand in line to buy with your lawful medical marijuana cards.

Thomas denies smoking pot in Cliffy's car. But even if he had, would you rather have him doing that, or getting caught up in a bar fight?

--KB

4 comments:

Freedom Fighter said...

Finally someone tells it like it is! Finally someone has the courage to say what everone knows but no one dares to speak! Way to go, Mad Duck! You put all those paid writers to shame!
Oregon has always hoped that the rest of the world would give it respect. No one is going to give them respect. They are going to have to take it. This year's campaign should go down as the STFU Tour. Oregon needs to deliver a serious beatdown every weekend starting with LSU.
Go Ducks!

Matter511 said...

Killer Bee "Your back Babyyyyyyy" Yahooooo. Tell it how it is my brother. Go Ducks and win the day

Anonymous said...

I am ready for you to post a picture of the new ducks tee shirt for 2011. "We Smoked It All" I am too lazy to do it myself!!

Killer Bee said...

Anonymous,
LOL. How about at the end of the year it says, "We smoked 'em all"?!?!